Goo

If you stay in your own world, you'll talk yourself out of living your own dream. - Kevin Knight

Met up with my buddy Kevin yesterday and talk turned to the world of acting, as it usually does.  And to be frank, I've felt frustrated lately.  Auditions are scarce, some projects I was working on have been put on hold, a major anniversary of my pursuit of this dream is looming and I've found myself sitting back and examining.  Wondering where I'm going, appreciating where I've been and looking for perspective.  Kevin is always one to look at the positive and when he said the above it really struck a chord with me.  This is a business of marketing yourself and honing in on your type and really focusing too much on what is happening with yourself.  There is so much more than this world of "me" and it is easy to fall into a narcissistic trap when examining your career.  The trouble is, when you are pursuing acting as a career and always hustling to make the next step happen, getting trapped in the goo of self is an easy one.  And if you stay in your own world, you lose sight of what life is really about.  This career is only one facet of what makes this life whole.  And empirically I know that.  Of course I do.  It is not and cannot be a main source of happiness.  Family, friends, experiences - these are the parts of life that are important.  But I, and nearly every actor I know, falls into the goo now and then.  And when you're in the goo, doubt and anxiety and that lowliest of human emotions, pity, starts to seep in.  And then we question whether we should keep going.  And you know what?  Sometimes it is time to transition into a new path.  But sometimes it is just time to just get out of your head for a bit and focus on the things that matter:  family, friends, experiences.  Refuel and recharge and, when you're ready, plow ahead.  Either on the same path or on a diverging one.  As long as you get out of your world and gain real perspective, you'll head in the right direction.