Julia Louis-Dreyfus and Her Teacher

Had an interesting evening Sunday night.

Me and the hubby went to hear Julia Louis-Dreyfus speak at a SAG Conversations event.  Before the doors opened, I went to use the restroom. Well, it was a bathroom that needed a key from security...which is always a pain.  So I knocked on the door because I heard someone in there.  I waited.  And waited.  But no one came.  So I turned to go back to security to get a key.  As I was going down the hallway, I ran into a woman who had a key!  Lucky me!  We started chatting and then she had difficulty getting the key to work, but I was able to figure it out, so we both finally got access to this locked restroom area.  And then we continued talking.  Turns out, she was Julia's drama teacher in high school from 8th to 12th grade!  I love stories like that so I asked her if Julia knew she was going to be there and she said, "Oh, no, no."  And then I asked if she had seen her since Julia graduated.  And she said, "Once but it was years ago."  And then I asked where she taught her.   And she said in the DC area.  And then it was time for me to head back to stand in line.  She told me her name was Phyllis and asked that I save her a seat up front if I got one.  I told her I would.

When I got back in line, I started telling my husband about this bathroom encounter and a few minutes later, up walked Phyllis.  She ended up standing in line with us and I mentioned that she taught Julia in DC and that my husband was from Baltimore.  Turns out Phyllis grew up there as well.  So they started talking about neighborhoods and such.  Then we heard a few more stories about Julia and the line began moving for us to be checked in.  When we got to the check-in table, they checked your SAG card and then found your name on the reservation list.  But for some reason...Phyllis's reservation didn't go through!  She wasn't on the list.  They told her she could stand to the side and try to get in on the wait list but they had to continue checking in the reserved guests first.  So she stood to the side and I told her I'd save her a seat.  I felt terrible!  Wasn't there something that could be done??  We went upstairs and saved a spot.  About ten minutes went by and then...here comes Phyllis!  She had worked her magic and had gotten in as someone else's guest that didn't show up.  She sat next to us and I felt a bit of relief!

There was a screening of Veep and then Julia did a Q&A session with a moderator from The Hollywood Reporter and it was great as expected.  She was funny and insightful and all around engaging.  The moderator asked at one point, "Who would you say was your best acting teacher?"  I held my breath!  What if she mentioned Phyllis??  She said, "Well, in high school all my teachers were really wonderful but if I were to look at my adult life, I'd say that the people I work with are my best teachers." So in a way she did mention her!

The Q&A came to a close but there was another one immediately following with another screening of Veep and more cast members so I knew they were going to whisk Julia away quickly.  I told Phyllis, "Go, go!  Get up there now while you have a chance!"  And Phyllis smiled and made her way to the front of the room where Julia still was.  I hung back and filled out a feedback form that they use to raise funds for events like this.  I saw Phyllis get close to the edge of the stage. And then I heard Julia go, "Oh my god!!  Why didn't you tell me you were here??  I would've had you stand up!!"  And I knew they had been reunited.

They started making their way to the back hallway and my husband and I left through the main hallway.  Well, the hallways connected and we ran right into them.  Phyllis reached out her hand to me and squeezed hard while she said, "Thank you for saving me a seat!"  I told her, "Of course!" And I thanked Julia for a great Q&A.  And then they were taken to a room to reconnect before the next engagement.

Later that night, Julia tweeted, "My high school drama teacher, Phyllis Ehrlich came to the @SAGFoundation panel tonight!  Lovely to see her!" And she attached the picture you see above.

We had a lovely time getting to know Phyllis a bit and I am so glad that it all worked out!  It wasn't looking good when the reservation snafu happened but all's well that ends well!

The State of the Blog

If you are a semi-regular reader of this blog, surely you've noticed a decline in postings in the past few months.  While, yes, I have been traveling a bit since May, I haven't been gone THAT much to warrant the kind of decrease in writing that is being seen.  So why the lack of blogging?

There are a few reasons.  First, in 2010 (and then it carried over into 2011), I made it a goal to post a blog every weekday.  It didn't have to be a mind-blowing revelation each day but it had to be something.  It was a challenge to myself.  And for the most part, I adhered to it.  I didn't give myself the same sort of challenge this year.  I guess I figured I had met that goal.  On to new things.  I started working on my screenplay last year and having a daily writing goal helped fuel the other writing goals in my life.  I'm not the kind of writer who has a need to always be writing.  Or the kind of writer who has an idea, sits down, and finishes their screenplay/novel/essay in record time.  Writing may come naturally to me but it is often the last thing I want to do.  I heard someone say once, "My house is never cleaner than when I have a writing deadline."  And it's true!  I will scrub the toilet before I sit down to write.  I will dust, vacuum, straighten, return emails, read blogs, et cetera, et cetera, and then, once I can no longer find a way to procrastinate, I'll sit down to write.  And it's a shame because usually when I write I actually end up enjoying it.  And I think to myself, I should have started this sooner!  But then an evening passes and I develop amnesia and forget all about that enjoyment.  And I start procrastinating again.

For this blog, I've always tried to keep it focused on my acting life.  Whether it be personal anecdotes or inspiring quotes or interesting articles about the business, my posts have been streamlined to focus on the pursuit of this dream.  And much of that dream has come true.  I've been beyond fortunate to work in this business of show and make money and be in the union and develop friendships and relationships with ridiculously talented people.  But.  If I'm being honest.  And I am.  I've grown tired lately.  I'm tired of the hustle and grind of it all.  I actually feel like I'm more tired of talking about it than I am actually doing it.  I've been on this road for ten years.  Exactly.  Ten years ago, yesterday, I moved to New York City to pursue my dream.  Two weeks later I booked my first commercial.  Ten years ago I thought I'd be in a very different place than I am right now.  Where exactly did I think I'd be?  I thought I'd be fending off the paparazzi on my way to work on my hit network show, naturally.  And while being on a hit network show still sounds fun,  I am beyond blessed to be where I am.  I have an amazing husband, a beautiful place to live, more close friends than I can count on two hands, a family that supports me, a union card, great reps, a resume I can be proud of, two commercials still holding and ten years of stories about the ups and downs in this pursuit.

And the pursuit continues.  But I'm not sure how much blog posting will happen.  I'll be around to share stories when they happen but most days I'm just living life.  And life reaches far beyond the constraints I've put on this blog.  Life consists of laundry and workshops and classes and coffee dates and long walks and TV watching and book reading and festival submissions and BBQs and knitting and volunteering and impromptu shoots and pizza and workouts and grocery shopping and book club...and...and...to quote one of my favorite writer/directors Cameron Crowe, from his movie Almost Famous, "It's all happening."

And it is.

Hello again!

Long time, no blog!

These past few weeks I've been traveling the East coast, visiting with family and friends, and getting away from the hustle and bustle of the acting world for a bit.

Some of the things I got to experience, in no particular order:  two Broadway shows, hanging out with the New Year's Eve ball, 9/11 memorial, eating freshly steamed crabs in Baltimore, visiting a quaint town in Maryland, hanging out with my nieces, seeing old friends, diving in the Florida Keys, eating lobster that we caught, eating fish that we caught, swimming with iguanas, lots of naps, sweltering heat in all our destinations, planes, trains and automobiles, walking down memory lanes in NYC, lots of quality time with family, lots of laughter, lots of love.

And now...it's back to the grind!

I cut my hair before I left and shot new headshots while in NY.  Will be getting some opinions from the reps this week and hope to have the new pictures in rotation soon.  As a little preview, here is one of the pics from the shoot:

Ooh la la, short hair!

Also will be starting Level 401 of Improv at UCB this week!  I graduated 301 back in May but since I was going to be traveling most of July, I had to wait to start up on the next class.  But I've been involved in a few practice groups in the meantime so I don't feel too rusty!  And I'm excited to be taking the class with my buddy John.  He and I were cast in a short film together years ago in NY and maintained a friendship ever since.  We took Sketch Writing at UCB together last summer so I know this final level should be lots of fun!

Impact

When Nora Ephron passed away this week, I was surprised at how upset I was.  While I love her movies and her writing, I didn't know her personally.  So how could I feel such a loss?  But that's the magic of being a writer.  I didn't have to know her personally because through her work, I did.  We all did.  Her films have informed our lives, making it personal.  I've been reading the essays that have been written to honor her, from Tom Hanks's reflections to Rita Wilson's to Diablo Cody's.  Lena Dunham's essay in The New Yorker really resonated with me because it's not only about her and Nora's relationship - even if it is. There is a universal truth to how she remembers her.  It speaks to how I remember those that I've lost.  How you see that significant person everywhere, in the little moments.  It's really a beautiful piece.

And then yesterday, Storyline Online - part of the SAG Foundation's literacy program that also does BookPALS and PencilPALS - shared their story of Nora Ephron.  Turns out that in the past two years Nora was a PencilPAL too.  She wrote to students in a fifth grade class in Corona Queens.  What a lucky group of students!  And the best part is, they probably don't grasp how lucky they are yet.  Finding out that Nora was also a PencilPAL added another level of kinship that I feel toward her.  This week I feel inspired to do more, to write more, to expect more.  And it is because of the impact Nora Ephron had on so many lives...whether she knew them or not.

Chasing The Hill

Last week I got to be involved with a project that I'm really excited about.  It's a new show called "Chasing The Hill," written and directed by Brent Roske.  It's a political drama that has an excellent script and an impressive cast and I got to play a small role in the pilot.  Even though they shot everything only last week, the first teaser is already online!  The show is going to premiere exclusively online in July but it is different than your typical "web series."  Most web shows are no longer than ten minutes, made with the short attention span of internet-ers in mind.  However this show is coming to you as a full-length 30-minute program, not unlike something you'd find on standard TV. And it is going to be pay-per-view.  You'll pay a few dollars like you would for a song.  A new wave of television, conveniently on your laptop.  It's an exciting new approach that I think is going to be a big success!

Check out the exclusive trailer and article about the series over at Politico.

Another school year comes to a close!

Yesterday was my last day of being a BookPAL for my two third grade classes. I started being a BookPAL last school year but only began after the winter break.  This was my first year being with them throughout the entire school year and it was such a rewarding experience.  To see the kids each week and share with them the joy of reading made a difference in my life and I hope in theirs as well.  We read several chapter books, which means we'd be with the same book for weeks at a time. I absolutely loved it when we'd start a book and then the next week a few kids had checked it out from the library...and then the next week a few more also did.  "What page are we on, Ms. Meagan?" was one of my favorite questions.

The two classes pitched in and got me a priceless gift of a signed school t-shirt and a book of thank you letters.

And one of the letters contained the best compliment I've ever...and probably will ever...received:

I mean, to be as awesome as a shark with shades...who can beat that??

I'm so grateful to the SAG Foundation for running BookPALS and PencilPALS.  Being a part of these programs has made such an impact on my life and, undoubtedly, on the lives of the students as well.  Reading and literacy has always been a positive influence in my life and being able to share that passion, even just once a week, is something truly special.

Rewarding Day

The sign our class painted, welcoming us.

My PencilPAL!

So I've talked before about being a BookPAL and how much I love it but this year I also became a PencilPAL.  This is through the same literacy program that the SAG Foundation runs.  As a PencilPAL, there is a fifth grade class that participates.  Each student is paired with a volunteer at the beginning of the school year and then you write to one another throughout the course of the year.  But you don't meet each other until the end of the year.  And yesterday was our big meet day!  It was so great to see all of the students and how excited they were to meet their PALs.  It was infectious!  They had painted signs for us that were all around the school and then each of them made us a personal welcome sign.  To discover who belonged to who, we played a fun game where we shared one fact about our PAL and then the student would reveal themselves.  I went up and said my student was a good sketch artist and they liked Pokemon.  As soon as I said the fact about Pokemon the whole class knew who my PAL was.  He is such a sweet kid, with a big smile and a big heart.  We talked about books and movies and then we all went to have a pizza party.  The teacher said that she has seen a real improvement in her students' writing abilities throughout the course of the year and she credits PencilPALs with helping her students grow.  It was so rewarding to be a part of this program and I really recommend it to my fellow actors who read this blog.

Last night I got to go to a panel with some of the actors from New Girl.  This was part of the Conversations series that SAG Foundation does (they do a lot of great things!).  Max Greenfield (Schmidt), Hannah Simone (Cece) and Lamorne Morris (Winston) were there, along with Seth Yanklewitz, the casting director of the pilot.  We heard more about their audition experiences for the show, the environment on the set and how much Lamorne loves the Miami Heat. When he learned that they lost last night, you would have thought his dog died.  He was also wearing a Heat t-shirt.  Made me think of my family...hope they were doing ok with the loss!  One tidbit I'll share from the night:  Hannah Simone talked about how she got called in for the role of Cece.  The previous pilot season, she had auditioned for another show that Seth cast.  She tested for a role but didn't book it.  When New Girl came along, Seth remembered her and called her in.  She said, "You never know what role you're actually auditioning for."  It can't be said enough!  You may not get cast initially but if you give it all you got...you'll book the room.  Then, when the right role comes along, the groundwork has been laid.

Been around the world (...and I, I, I)*

Hello there.  Long time, no post.

But I'm back!  I was on the high seas spending a lovely cruise with my husband's family and it was great being able to spend quality time with everyone.  We had to avoid the first tropical storm of the season as we started our journey and then we had to skip the last port so we could avoid the second tropical storm of the season on our way back.  But we survived the stormy seas and have good memories to last us.

Half Moon Cay, Bahamas

Now, just getting back into the swing of things...and the swinging is going well!  I had a commercial audition yesterday, which was a lovely way to kick off the week.  Last night I went to another Tuesdays@9 and I am definitely going to be making this a weekly occurrence.  Of course, they are going on summer break in a few weeks but I'm glad to have discovered it now and may even submit some of my writing to be considered for the rotation in the fall.  I put a link there so you can learn a little more about it but it's basically a cold reading series where writers (about five or six a night) have about 10 pages of a project read aloud and they cast from the actors that are there that night to read.  My friend from my improv class had a piece going up a few weeks ago so I went to listen and she gave me a little part to read, which was a lot of fun.  Since I was traveling, I hadn't had a chance to go back yet but last night was my chance.  And turns out she was having part two of her piece read so I got to participate again.  I've really enjoyed the energy and the spirit of these nights.  Reminds me of NY and the communal spirit of wanting to create.  They also have a musical break after the first three pieces are read.  Last night the artist was Natalie Gelman and man-oh-man did she have a voice.  She started to sing and it sounded like she had a mic but she didn't.  Her voice filled the room. One of the songs she sang was called Long Stemmed Roses and I've already listened to it a few more times today.  I'm definitely a fan now and will be following her career...hope it's a big one!



* Also, the title of this post is courtesy of that late 80s hit by Lisa Stansfield, All Around the World.  "...I can't find my baby...I don't know when, I don't know why..."

Upfronts Week: A Roller Coaster of Tweets

Upfronts, where the networks announce their fall schedules in order to court advertisers, were this week in NY.  Which shows are getting another season, which pilots are getting picked up.  It is undoubtedly an exciting time for those that got a time slot this fall.  It is also a sobering time for those that had a show canceled or a pilot that didn't make the cut.  With social media, we are seeing the emotions played out through 140 characters like never before.  When it was announced his show was not coming back Patrick Wilson, star of The Gifted Man, made some waves by tweeting,

"So...shocking to no one: #agiftedman is done. Found out via email...and not from the network. Stay classy. Thanks to AGM fans! ... but now that it's "official," I couldn't be happier. As good as it was (sometimes) it was not what I signed on for."  

Kristin Chenoweth just tweeted this morning about how her show, GCB, is not coming back and she is clearly surprised, 

"I seriously can't believe with our ratings GCB is cancelled!"  

The news that her show is not coming back has been out there for several days, so it's taking a while to sink in.  Same with Kathy Bates.  Harry's Law was canceled and she has taken to Twitter to commiserate with fans responding to tweets that she is "hanging in there."  She sent out a thank you to her fans last night, 

"Thanks all you HL Tweeters. You guys amaze me with your love and support. You've made it easier to come to grips with this disappointment."

On the other side of the coin is the people who work on the shows that got picked up or are continuing for another season.  They are all having a Twitter party.  The cast of Parenthood tweeted what seemed to be genuine surprise and gratitude about their show sticking around for a fourth season.  Mindy Kaling's pilot was picked up and she played the announcement cool by retweeting congrats from her fellow working actors and thanking them.  She also congratulated other shows that got picked up, like Whitney and Parks and Rec, by retweeting them or quoting them.

Basically, Twitter was one giant mood swing this week for those in the business of television.  And those are just people I follow or heard about or chose to mention.  There were plenty of writers, directors, show creators and more actors that sent out their excitement or disappointment this week and it has been interesting to follow along.

I was particularly invested this year in hearing about which pilots were getting picked up because I had several friends cast on pilots and I had my fingers crossed.  The shows they worked on all seemed like shoe-ins.  Major established stars and/or established plot formulas anchored their shows and I thought, "This is it!  They did it!  They booked shows - good shows - and now they are going to be steadily working for a long time.  Dreams come true, y'all!"

Dot. Dot. Dot.

...that's what it sounded like as news started trickling out late last week about which shows the networks were going with.  As the day grew longer and more shows were announced and the ones I was crossing my fingers for didn't make the lists, the sound of the ellipses grew louder.  I can only imagine how deafening it was for my friends actually on these shows.  I was just a cheerleader, hoping for a touchdown.  They are the ones that got left sitting on the sidelines, not getting a chance to play.  Surely having worked on these pilots will open doors for them and opportunities will continue to happen but I'm disappointed.  I was really hoping that the doors that they had already opened would stay open.

I think that is why I'm so enthralled with the emotional roller coaster happening over on Twitter this past week.  No matter how established your career is - whether you're just starting out or you've been working for decades - you're not immune to the disappointments.  Or to the excitements. Which isn't a great revelation but the emotional fallout has never really been this accessible.  Most people working seem to realize how rare that is.  And those left without a job are wondering where they'll end up next.  And those on the sidelines are hoping to get into the game.  And those of us cheerleading hope to be sitting on the sidelines next time around.  To mix my sporting metaphors, I feel like a lot of people are thinking..."Put me in coach...I'm ready to play today."

Trust Where You Are

Sorry for the long delay in between posts, my friends.  I served on a jury last week and then I was struck down by the flu.  Why, yes, it was a humdinger of a time.

Now that I'm feeling much better, I'm getting back into the swing of things...including blogging. While I was on my sick-couch (that's my new name for the couch I didn't leave for several days), I came across a good little article in Backstage.  It is an interview with Broadway stars Brian d'Arcy James and Donna Murphy with a little bit of advice for newcomers.  You can check out the whole thing here but I wanted to share with you something that Donna Murphy said that really stood out to me:

"There's an element of trust that you're exactly where you're meant to be at any given moment," she said. "I remember spending an awful lot of energy in my 20s thinking 'Why aren't I being seen for this or why aren't I doing this?' As I looked back, once I was in my 30s, 40s, and now a little bit later than that, I realized I wasn't ready for that or it wasn't the right moment in time. It's really about finding opportunities where you can work and if they don't come to you, you make them. You get a group of actors together - whether it's as formal as creating a company or as informal as just reading plays together once a week - so that whether you're given a job or not, you're still working. I also believe in becoming as aware a citizen of the world as possible. Because it imbues your work with levels that go way beyond what your acting training brings you. Craft to me is huge and it's also about continuing to grow as a person."

I love this.

It really is about creating opportunities.  That was our tagline and mantra with the production company I started in NY and even though that company is dissolved, the spirit lives on.  That's why web series like Girl Parts are so important.  That's why the screenplay I wrote (and am still tinkering with) is important.  That's why improv, with weekly classes and practice groups, is important.  Sketches grow from those practices.  Scenes get filmed.  Opportunities get made.  This industry gets frustrating when the phone isn't ringing.  And you can start to feel like you're not enough.  But the reason you started on this journey IS.  And when you continue to create, continue to engage, continue to work...everything else will follow suit.  And you'll start to "trust that you're exactly where you're meant to be at any given moment."

Bryan Cranston

Bryan Cranston is by far one of my favorite actors working today.  The following video where he talks about his journey and advice for actors just solidifies that sentiment even further:

Run Your Race

Just finished this race and PR'd by
nearly 2 minutes. Clearly I was thrilled.

I have never been particularly athletic.  Which we've discussed.  But I have always been competitive.  Ask anyone that's ever played a board game with me...I can be ruthless.  So when I started running consistently late last year, you better believe it had something to do with races.  Over the past year my husband has been training for and doing really well in 5Ks.  Since I'm going to be there to cheer him on, I figured I'd better run too.  I mean, these things start way too early in the morning and if I'm going to be up, I better be getting some sort of medal.  At first I would just run and hope to finish without walking along the way.  And I did.  It felt good to finish but it also felt a little lame when both seven-year-olds and seventy-year-olds would breeze past me.   When I started running regularly these past six months, I figured maybe I could improve upon my times.  Start to run a little faster.  Have a little more confidence in my abilities.  I've run three races since the start of the year and I've noticed two things:

1.  I am still lapped by people decades younger or older than me.
2.  Each time my pace has improved, which means I've "PR'd" at each race (PR=personal record).

Basically I've learned this: I have to run MY race.  Not anyone else's.

That's one of the beauties of running.  Sure, you can be in a race with hundreds of people but at the finish line the only person you need to worry about is yourself.  I find that I'll keep my eye on somebody in the race and think, "As long as I stay on pace with Pink Socks, I'm doing good."  And then sometimes Pink Socks will pick up the pace and I'll lose sight of her.  Or sometimes I'll run past Pink Socks and think, "Dang, I'm doing better than I thought."  Sometimes I'll just zone out and listen to my music, wave at the people cheering the runners on and enjoy the view.  Then I'll see a mile marker and think, "I need to pick up the pace."  Or I'll think, "You're doing good! Faster than you thought!"  I also like to sprint it out at the end.  When I see the finish line, I like to run faster and secure that PR.

So what does any of this have to do with acting?  Last night after our last improv class, we all went out for a drink to celebrate.  I was sitting, talking to two other women in my class and it was interesting because one is in her early 20s, just starting out.  The other is in her 40s, just coming back after taking time off from acting.  And I'm in the middle.  And we were talking about agents and managers and marketing ourselves and where we're at in our careers and where we hope to go and where we thought we'd be.  And it just clicked.  We're all in the same race.  There are mile markers along the way.  There are people that we stay on pace with.  There are people that we pass.  There are people that zoom past us.  And it's easy to see someone zooming past and think, "Why can't I run that fast??"  But then you forget about the other people behind you that might be thinking the same thing about you.  It's only when you focus on where you are and how you can improve your time that you start to win.  A career in acting is not linear.  You can be on a hit show one day and waiting tables the next.  You can take classes, meet casting directors, get great pictures and still not get called in for auditions.  You can go on your first audition ever and book it.  And then not book another job for years.  It's not a career where you get a degree, get an entry-level job, after a certain amount of time you get a raise and you can check off the boxes at regularly scheduled intervals as you climb the ladder.  Sure...it might happen that way.  But the intervals are far from regularly spaced.  And sometimes the next rung seems out of reach. But you'll get there.  We'll all get exactly to where we are supposed to be.

Lots of people say about acting, "It's a marathon, not a sprint."  Which always sounded like rhetoric to me...until I started running.  It doesn't matter where you are on the course.  You can be at the starting line or somewhere in the middle.  You can be young or old.  You can be trying to keep up with someone ahead of you or you can just be enjoying the view.  Our only true competition is ourselves.  And when you're competitive....you'll get yourself to that finish line.

For the birds

I had a commercial audition on Friday.  After I parked my car, I waited to cross the street to get to the casting office.  As I waited, a bird passing by decided to...how should I put this delicately...poop on me.  I mean, that's gotta be good luck, right?  Yeah, that's what I figured.

After my audition I got to work more on my screenplay and I'm very nearly done with my next draft.  A few more adjustments and then we'll see!

On Saturday night, I got to be Fadhia's plus-one at a party that her agency threw to celebrate their 20th anniversary and the agency founder's birthday.  It was a lot of fun!  Probably the most fun I've had at one of these kinds of parties.  Usually you go and it is at a loud Hollywood club, parking is twenty dollars, drinks are twenty dollars, the music is not my cup of tea and there are too many people.  And when that's the case, I'm the kind of person that would much rather be at home on the couch.  But we found free parking within walking distance, it was an open bar, the DJ played fun music - from old school rap to Gaga - and there was plenty of room for everyone.  So we danced and smiled for the cameras and had a great time.  Thanks, Fa!

Revived

Just a little glimpse. 

This past weekend was a lovely and quick trip to Florida.  My cousin got married on a beautiful property that means a lot to my family and the rain that was forecasted (and that happened in the hours leading up to the ceremony) decided not to show up for the wedding.  So we all took off our shoes and danced the night away.  It felt like a hug to be around my family, even if it was just for a few days, and was just what I needed.  Improv class yesterday was a lot of fun.  Only one more class before our show and a bunch of us went out afterwards to celebrate and get to know each other better.  And right now, I'm about to dive into another rewrite of my screenplay.  I received extensive notes this week that I'm excited to incorporate and tinker with.  I was feeling a little stuck for awhile and now, armed with this feedback, I'm ready to tackle the project again.  Truly thankful to A. who took the time to read and respond with such constructive notes.  Ok...enough of my slight procrastination...ok, my more-than-slight procrastination...time to get to work.

Goo

If you stay in your own world, you'll talk yourself out of living your own dream. - Kevin Knight

Met up with my buddy Kevin yesterday and talk turned to the world of acting, as it usually does.  And to be frank, I've felt frustrated lately.  Auditions are scarce, some projects I was working on have been put on hold, a major anniversary of my pursuit of this dream is looming and I've found myself sitting back and examining.  Wondering where I'm going, appreciating where I've been and looking for perspective.  Kevin is always one to look at the positive and when he said the above it really struck a chord with me.  This is a business of marketing yourself and honing in on your type and really focusing too much on what is happening with yourself.  There is so much more than this world of "me" and it is easy to fall into a narcissistic trap when examining your career.  The trouble is, when you are pursuing acting as a career and always hustling to make the next step happen, getting trapped in the goo of self is an easy one.  And if you stay in your own world, you lose sight of what life is really about.  This career is only one facet of what makes this life whole.  And empirically I know that.  Of course I do.  It is not and cannot be a main source of happiness.  Family, friends, experiences - these are the parts of life that are important.  But I, and nearly every actor I know, falls into the goo now and then.  And when you're in the goo, doubt and anxiety and that lowliest of human emotions, pity, starts to seep in.  And then we question whether we should keep going.  And you know what?  Sometimes it is time to transition into a new path.  But sometimes it is just time to just get out of your head for a bit and focus on the things that matter:  family, friends, experiences.  Refuel and recharge and, when you're ready, plow ahead.  Either on the same path or on a diverging one.  As long as you get out of your world and gain real perspective, you'll head in the right direction.

Reading is awesome

So I've mentioned a time or two on here that I'm a BookPALS volunteer.  It's a pretty special thing to be able to read to my two classes every week.  Usually I read the same book in each class but last week we did something different.  It was the return from spring break and we needed to start a new book.  I had a couple of options because my classes are really well-read and it was very possible that they would have already read something I picked out to read together.  James and the Giant Peach was my first choice to read but I also had The BFG and Tales of the Fourth Grade Nothing in my bag, just in case.  Went to my first class and asked how many students had already read James and the Giant Peach.  Pretty much all of them had.  No problem, I had back up.  And while I was listing the other choices, one little girl says, "I want to read Charlotte's Web."  And then the whole class got excited about wanting to read Charlotte's Web.  It was in their teacher's library and they hadn't read it yet.  So then I got excited about reading Charlotte's Web.  So we made a change of plans and started to read it.  I love how there are certain books that just enthrall children.  They sit and listen, wide-eyed and swept into another world.  This book had that immediate effect.  I went into the next class, prepared with the same choices but this time I had Charlotte's Web as an additional choice.  But when I asked if anyone had read James and the Giant Peach, only one girl had read it.  And she has read everything (a little like me as a kid).  So I gave the other option of Charlotte's Web but this teacher had plans to read it to them soon so we decided on James and the Giant Peach!  Some of the students had seen the movie so they are having fun discovering the differences between the movie and the original story.  It is really fun discovering two different stories together with my 3rd graders and I'm excited to continue today!

**Update:  So I got to my first class yesterday and they were all like, "We saw the movie on Friday!  Charlotte dies in the end!"  And I was gobsmacked!  So was the teacher.  She didn't know that it was shown to them.  So I wasn't sure what to do...cause I left all of my other books at home.  Luckily, most of them (there were some dissenters) wanted to still hear the story.  I explained that the movies of the books always are different and there is more detail in the book and, sure enough, by the time we got going, all of them were caught up in the story...even the ones that dissented.  In my second class, several of the kids had checked out James and the Giant Peach from the library and brought their books to read along.  Love that!

Breathing is good

I spend some time on Pinterest, collecting recipes and inspiring images.  This one resonated with me yesterday and maybe it will with you too.  Here's to just breathing.

Source: a2.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net via Meagan on Pinterest

Fun

One glass was my limit.

I had a commercial audition today!  It was a fun spot and I ended up running into several people I know so it felt like a fun little reunion.  Yesterday was a fun improv class and then last night the hubby and I went to a super fun date night (I've used the word "fun" a lot in this post).  Anyway...it was with Wine and Canvas and we had a blast.  Basically you get three hours of painting instruction, along with all the materials you need.  All you do is show up and paint!  And these are held at restaurants so you can eat, drink and be merry as well.  At the end of the time you have a little masterpiece to call your own.  I highly recommend it.  I found out about it through Living Social so it was a great deal but we are already checking into when we can go again...at regular price.  I know.  Crazy.  That's how much we liked it.  And we weren't the only ones.  There were several people there for their second/third/multiple times.

This afternoon I'm running through lines with a friend for a project she is shooting soon and then hopefully will get a little writing done this afternoon.  Full and fun.  Word of the day.

Finished products!  Ta-da!

Sizzle Pop

The view at the starting line of the Hollywood 5K I ran on Saturday.

Bubblin' and brewin'.  Getting feedback on my screenplay, getting feedback on a short I wrote, making plans for making them beyond the page.  Running, exercising, eating right.  Balancing life out, letting go of fixating.  Going to improv class, going to improv practice, going to improv shows.  Watching movies, feeling inspired, painting.  Reminiscing, writing a new project, unlocking, figuring things out.  Looking forward, making new plans, making no plans, letting it happen.  Words words words.  Thoughts thoughts thoughts.  Actions actions actions.  Bubblin' and brewin'.

Learning

That could have been me in the overalls

While growing up, I went to drama camp, danced in recitals, sang at bars with local musicians, did community theatre, got paid to do murder-mystery dinner theatre and even snagged a lead role when I was in 9th grade in the one play my high school did my entire four years I was there.  We didn't have a drama department and I'm not sure why there were no more plays after that one.  Let's pretend it was some major scandal that prevented us all from performing (in reality, it probably had a lot to do with plays being low on the totem-pole-of-priorities at my school). The point is, I did what I could, wherever I could, whenever I could when it came to acting.  I had a dream, y'all.  When I was thirteen there was an open call for The Babysitter's Club movie.  THIS. WAS. HUGE to my thirteen-year-old self.  Not only was I a Babysitter's Club book nerd who read and collected all of the books and started her own Babysitter's Club (that maybe lasted only a week, but still, I made folders), it was a movie that I was absolutely right for.  And it was holding an open casting two hours from my house!!  This kind of stuff didn't happen.  There is a bit of a filming boom happening in Miami now but when I was growing up?  Nope.  This was a rarity.  With the resolve of new-teenage certainty, I convinced my parents to take me down to Miami to audition and, bless their hearts, they made the drive.  Turns out it was a good thing they did!  I'm pretty sure there was a cold read of some sort.  And I have a distinct memory of sitting along a hallway, waiting.  And then came the word:  Of the 700 girls that showed up, only 30 were called back...and I snagged myself a callback for the role of "Kristy"!  This was all I could have ever hoped for.  In the end, that was as far as the day went.  I didn't actually get cast but it didn't matter.  To my mind I could have.  They liked me enough to ask me to stay.  And the damage was done: that is when I learned that dreams came true.

Side note: When they ended up casting the role, I also learned a little about the advantages of being a celebrity offspring in Hollywood.  Schuyler Fisk (aka, daughter of Sissy Spacek) was cast as Kristy.  Surely not only because of her mother but I've since learned, in this town, family trees can help.

Fear & Satisfaction

Follow your dreams, or they will become nightmares. - Paulo Coelho

Regret is one of the great fears.  It is something the motivates us and it can also be something that cripples us.  If we don't follow our dream, will we torture ourselves always wondering "what if?"  If we do follow our dream and it takes longer to achieve than expected, do we ever allow ourselves to move on?  Do we channel our original dream into a new one?  Is it ok to shoot for the moon and miss?  That's the whole point of that quote though, isn't it?  "Shoot for the moon.  Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars." You will no longer be earthbound, scared to leap, because you did it.  You went for it.  And there is a deep satisfaction in the journey.

Trashcans

In my second to last semester in college, I decided to take a "conditioning" class, which turned out to be like PE on meth (ps - you should know that any meth references I make are purely drawn from my knowledge of Breaking Bad).  So, yes, hardcore physical education.  Class was three times a week, starting at 7am.  As a college student, and as a student of life since, 7am has always been a difficult hour for me.  But if you missed more than one class, you dropped a letter grade.  If you were late it was the same thing as missing class.  There were no excuses.  Now is probably a good time to mention that I was never that athletically inclined.  I always had good intentions to be athletic but there was always a disconnect between my intentions and my reality.  For example, I took dance classes for twelve years but my parents wonder where all that money went (I still think I'm an awesome dancer, but, whatever).  I also grew up playing basketball at the Y, thanks to my basketball coach father.  I was always the only girl on the team and there is a classic photo somewhere of me holding the basketball and all of my boy teammates holding their hands out to me, screaming for me to pass to them.  (Jerks.)  I even was on the middle school basketball team but when it came to trying out for the high school team, I got cast in a play at the community theatre instead and said sayonara to the court.  I thought I'd join the track team in tenth grade but then the week of our first track meet I had a mysterious, severe allergic reaction - unrelated to running! - that put me in the hospital for the day and took me off the track team as we tried to figure out how not to kill me in the future.  So yeah.  Athletics and I have a pock-marked past.  Which leads us to my conditioning class in college.

I went to the University of Florida, which is known for its athletic programs (Go Gators!).  If you visit the campus on any given day, you may be led to believe that everyone that attends college there is athletic.  There is always a bevy of joggers, bikers, rollerbladers (well, maybe not rollerbladers anymore but when I was there) and the like exercising their way around the streets of Gainesville.  The gyms are always packed, people run the stadium and there is a general sense of healthy physical activity taking place at any given hour.  I would look at these people and think, Yeah, I should do that.  But....I didn't.  I just didn't like exercising.  And I was blessed with a 'fast metabolism' so I never felt much of a need to workout.  (Jerk.)  But as my college years were coming to a close I realized that my lucky metabolism wasn't going to last forever and I was about to enter the real world.  And I was going to finally pursue my dream of being an actor.  And I couldn't just rest on my laurels and hope said-laurels would remain small.  I needed to get some sort of exercise plan going.  And I needed to develop good habits.  And I needed a conditioning class where my GPA depended on my dedication to the exercising because otherwise, chances are, I would have jogged around a bit and said, That's good enough, and never jog again.  So I took this class.  

And it was hard.  And my teacher was young and athletic and way too spunky and energetic for 7 o'clock in the god-forsaken morning.  She was not playing around.  And I thought, Dear God, what have I gotten myself into?  This was a mistake.  There was no way I was going to be able to keep up or even have hope in passing this class.  I was on track to graduate early and head straight to NY and this stupid idea of a class was going to ruin my plans.  Of course, I wasn't going to let my plans of pursuing my dream be ruined.  So I didn't miss class.  And I tried to keep up.  And I'll never forget one day in particular....

We were running inside the stadium.  We had run up and down the stadium seats several times and now were running a loop through the halls.  I was not doing so great.  I was at the back of the pack.  I was moving slowly.  And I was going to vomit.  I wasn't used to this level of activity and my stomach was rebelling.  It was saying, Slow down or I quit.  So I stopped at a trashcan and prepared to lose my breakfast.  My teacher runs up behind me and yells, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"  I mumbled back with labored breath, my face as red as a tomato, sweat pouring down, "I'm going to puke." "FINE. THERE'S ANOTHER TRASHCAN UP THERE. PUKE UP THERE."  She pointed to a trash can another 50 feet away.  It seemed like a mile away.  I shook my head, bile rising.  She yelled, "GO! GO!"  And she frightened me - before and during that moment - so I shuffled toward the other trashcan.  

And then something amazing happened.  I got to the other trashcan and I didn't stop. I kept running. Suddenly I wasn't going to be sick anymore.  I finished that day's class with one of the biggest senses of accomplishment I've ever felt.

I realized I was strong enough to keep going.

***

Now, I'd like to tell you that I became a championship runner after that class.  Or a real gym rat.  Or a personal trainer.  The reality is, I think I got a B in the class.  I graduated, moved to NY and walked pretty much everywhere and counted that as exercise.  I've dabbled in running since but it has only been these past three months where I have been dedicated to it.  Dudes, I'm running 5-6 times a week and have been since the last week in December.  I'm really proud.  But that's not the point of this story.

The point is....sometimes you get tired.  Sometimes you don't think you can go any further.  Sometimes you stop to puke in a trashcan.  And sometimes you need someone to yell at you and tell you to puke in the next trashcan 50 feet away.  And I hope by now you realize we're not talking about trashcans anymore.  

Discontent and disorder are signs of energy and hope, not of despair. - Dame Cicely Veronica Wedgwood

In this little business called acting, we face rejection after rejection.  Almost after almost.  An extended amount of downtime between jobs.  There is no shame in wanting to stop at the trashcan and quit.  But trust there is another one ahead you can stop at.  And maybe once you get there...you'll decide to pass it and keep going.

Full evening ahead!

My buddy graduates from the second level of improv class tonight so I'm going out to support and laugh loudly.  After that, I'm headed to a read-through of my friend's new play.  This is the same one we workshopped back in October.  She sent over the script so that we could prepare for tonight and I am really excited to hear and see the adjustments since we last met.  I'm also excited to be a part of the forward progress of this project.  It's inspiring seeing an idea become a reality!

Spring rain

I have an audition today, folks.  It's been a slow stretch for me so I'm glad this has come along.  I have to miss my improv class, which is a bummer, but I can make it up.  And with that little update, I must go get to work!

Updates

I started the next level of Improv yesterday and I'm really excited for this class.  I like our teacher, I like the group of people and I think we're going to have fun.  Half of the class is made up of my classmates from my last class, so that is fun that we are all together again.

So...we didn't win any of the Indie Intertube awards that we were nominated for.  Just call us the Susan Luccis and Meryl Streeps of the web world.  Did you realize that the Oscar Ms. Streep just collected was her first in 30 years?  Nominated all those times between then and now.  So yeah, totally ok that we didn't win.  Sometimes the most brilliant among us are clapping as they call someone else's name!  Meanwhile though, we are in syndication on Koldcast.tv and we are constantly coming in as one of their most watched shows.  Love that we are finding a new audience!

New favorite

The truly creative mind in any field is no more than this: A human creature born abnormally, inhumanely sensitive. To them... a touch is a blow, a sound is a noise, a misfortune is a tragedy, a joy is an ecstasy, a friend is a lover, a lover is a god, and failure is death. 

Add to this cruelly delicate organism the overpowering necessity to create, create, create -- so that without the creating of music or poetry or books or buildings or something of meaning, their very breath is cut off... 

They must create, must pour out creation. By some strange, unknown, inward urgency they are not really alive unless they are creating.  - Pearl Buck

GIRL PARTS is nominated for six Indie Intertube Awards, including BEST COMEDY.  The awards are this Sunday and they just released a promo about the show.  The promo starts with the above quote.  I hadn't heard the quote before and now...well, now it might be one of my favorites.

I'm gonna miss House

Working on House was one of the most fun days I've had as an actor.  First job on network television, my role was small but the day felt big.  It certainly helped that both Hugh Laurie and Robert Sean Leonard were beyond gracious and welcoming.  I'm sad that the show is coming to an end this season and am grateful that I had the chance to be a part of it.  Came across this little audio interview with Hugh Laurie and thought it was worth sharing.  He talks about how being an "unknown" helped him with this part and how that is certainly not always - in fact, is rarely - the case.  Having seen the casting announcements thus far for pilots this season, it is evident that now more than ever it is difficult to break in without being "known."  Of course, Hugh had a lot going for him across the pond (I always remembered him fondly from Sense and Sensibility), so he was by no means new to this.  But that's the way, isn't it?  You build and you work for years and years and, if you're lucky, an opportunity comes along and suddenly you are an "overnight success."

Stories

Did you watch the Oscars last night?

I didn't.

I know....what??  It is easily the first time in years that I missed the show.  It's all on dvr and I know who won - I mean, there were no real surprises last night, after all.  But I was on a plane, headed back from the east coast where we had spent the weekend with family.  It feels nice to step out of this town now and again and stepping out on "Hollywood's Biggest Night" felt especially nice.  A little rebellious.  (I know.  I just rolled my eyes too.)  But stepping away  when the hoopla is at it's pinnacle gives you a chance to remember why you do this.  Yes, to be up on stage accepting an Oscar one day will be a thrill.  But it can't be the only reason we're pursuing this.  It is a wonderful goal to strive toward, a northern star of sorts.

But it starts with a love.  A love for creating, a love for performing, a love for storytelling.  Being with family never fails to remind me of that.  I come from a family of amazing storytellers.  And I married into a family that loves to sit around the dining table, telling story after story.  To me, that is a major part of what being a family is.  The creation of stories, the recounting of stories - the stories we make together, the stories we share with each other, the stories we write just by being born.  I feel incredibly blessed to have been born into a family of storytellers, to marry into a family of storytellers and to create a family of storytellers with the friends I hold dear.  This is why we are here - to share with each other, to learn from each other, to relate to each other.  Finding the common thread is why I do what I do.  That is what being an actor is to me.

....and one day I may get to say all that on a stage while hugging a little golden statue, trying to beat the music.  Or I may not.  But it is comforting to know that the stories will continue to be written, continue to be told.  And all I want is to continue being a part of the narrative.

Adventures

When we shift our inner statement from "I'd love to" to "I'm going to," we shift out of victim and into adventurer. - Julia Cameron, Walking in This World

Mental shifts go a long way in this business.  Last year I vowed to get off of the mental-hamster-wheel and I've done much better...but I do find myself slipping into old habits now and again.  With social media it is pretty easy to see who is being cast in what, who is working on what, who booked that commercial you went in for, who is testing for pilots, who has a new project they are developing, who went to a red carpet event.  And it's easy to look at what everyone else is doing and think, "Why not me?  I'd love to...book that job/go in for that show/meet that casting director/sign with that agent/work on that project."  And before you know it, a little 'woe-is-me' song and dance starts serenading and sashaying all over your psyche.  And bitterness bubbles up.  And then sadness.  And then suddenly everything you are doing isn't enough.  And you're a victim.  Might as well face it, you're a victim of love.  A victim of "I'd love to."

Something magical starts to happen though when you make that tiny shift of "I'd love" to "I'm going".  You feel a little lighter.  A little happier.  You think of all the possibilities that you are going to make happen.  You start to make lists of shows you're right for, casting directors you want to meet, classes you want to take, stories you want to write, projects you want to create, books you want to read.  You start to realize how incredibly blessed you are to be an artist, to be pursuing art as your life - not as a hobby or a secret passion - but as your way of life.  And you start to feel happy for other people's successes instead of resentful.  Because you realize that you are going to be celebrating your own successes soon enough.  And being right where you are at, with your lists and your "going-to's," is enough to start celebrating right now.  You are on an adventure.  And you are in charge of how your road looks.  Once you open yourself up to that truth, there is no telling where the road may lead.

Caution: Lots of pictures ahead

It's an overcast morning.  The town is quiet for the holiday.  And it's quiet for me as I sit here, about to have a cup of tea, reflecting on the past week and looking at my to-do list for this week.  My sister and her boyfriend flew into town for a last minute trip last week and I miss having them here.  We were all over this town - from Hollywood to Malibu to the high seas.  Seriously.  High seas.  We went sailing yesterday afternoon with our friends and it was very windy out there.  There may have been some queasy stomachs aboard.  But seasickness aside, it was a full, fun trip and a very nice visit with family.

The Chubbuck Holiday Party was last night and I wasn't sure if I was going to go.  After driving to the airport to drop off our house guests, I was still in comfy sweats and ready to stay in for the night.  But good friends convinced me to go so I dolled myself up and hit the club.  I have to admit...clubs are not for me.  Loud and crowded are two things I'm not a fan of.  But it was good to catch up with friends and old classmates.  I mean, as much as once can catch up yelling over loud music.  Oh man. I'm such an old biddy.  Ahem.  Let's start over.  I had fun seeing old friends, meeting a few new ones and watching people dance.  I may have even shook my hips to the beat as well.  I'm not a total stick in the mud.  Geez.

Kwesiu Jones

Fadhia Marcelin

Angel Oquendo

Reid Gormly

Melinda Hughes
& Cameron McCormick

And now it's time for me to tackle that to-do list that looms before me.  I'm most excited about starting to read "Walking in This World" by Julia Cameron.  It is the follow-up to The Artist's Way about the practical application of putting all that unlocked creativity to use.  Watch out world!  I'm walking here!

Oh! And one last bit of business before I go...GIRL PARTS is syndicated!  Starting today, the series is relaunching episodes every Monday on Koldcast.tv.  It's exciting to be bringing the show to a new audience every week.  Feel free to tell your friends that haven't gotten a chance to watch yet to check us out at our new home!

A new mantra

Just read an interview with Michelle Williams and she says this:

I always loved the Amish saying, “Head down to the ground, heart to the sky, Pray but move your feet, work but keep dreaming.” I knew what I wanted to do and it takes one person to give you the chance to try it.

The interviewer was asking how she managed to have this celebrated and challenging career, after getting her start in a teen drama (Dawson's Creek).  Not many actors can make that transition and yet she has.  The above was part of her response.

But doesn't it apply to all of us who are hustling to make this career happen everyday?  "I knew what I wanted to do and it takes one person to give you the chance to try it."  We keep moving forward, taking classes, going to workshops, writing our own work, praying as we go into auditions, praying that we get auditions, dreaming all along the way.  And it only takes that one right person to give us a chance.  So we meet and we network and we put work out there.  Because we have to.  Because we love the work.  And because we dream that the right person will come along and see that "something special" that is in us and give us a shot.  Give us work.  Let us shine.


Head down to the ground, heart to the sky, pray but move your feet, work but keep dreaming.  

Everyday. 

VOTE (please!!)

Thanks to your help....we made it into the Top Ten Finalists for the Indie Intertube Audience Choice Award!  From now until February 15th, you can vote once a day for GIRL PARTS.  Please vote from your laptop, your desktop, your iPad, your phone....you get the idea.  Anywhere you can vote from would be awesome!

It's so easy too - no form to fill out or information to give.  Just click and vote!

VOTE HERE

And thank you!!!

Smash = A Mirror

At my going away party in NY,
before I moved to LA.

Did you watch Smash last night?  We did.  And we had to keep pausing and looking at each other and saying, "What?" "Really?" "Stop it."  That was basically the conversation between me and my husband.  The show hit really close to home.  From the first audition we see Katherine McPhee's character at where the director takes the call in the middle of her singing to the dinner she has with her boyfriend and her parents to the shot of her singing along to the leaked Youtube video, it was like someone had sneaked in and leaked video of my life.  My life now and my life in New York.  Watching the show made me feel nostalgic for my time in New York and my youth.  I know, I know, I'm still young.  But I was in my twenties.  I was just out of college.  I was pursuing this dream that seemed so possible, so fresh, so exciting.  And yet it was so obvious that it wasn't going to be easy.  It was never going to be easy.  So there was that part of the show that felt ripped from my own headlines.  And even now, the show hit close.  Yesterday I found out that I needed to record a clip of me singing to upload to the casting sites.  There are a lot of pilots being cast that need real singers and I need to show them that I can. So I sat here yesterday, going through the possible songs I could sing, singing along and testing them out.  This was before we watched the show.  And today I'll tape it and hope that the right person sees it.  And so the cycle goes.  

I think the most sobering part of the show is that I am not unique in feeling like it was a slice of my life.  There is a reason the writing felt so close to home - because it is a cliche.  And cliches are true. This is what we all go through in this business.  All of us pursuing this dream get that rude audition or that conversation that tells you to be realistic or we have that night, sitting in front of our computers, learning a new song as we continue to dream.  We get frustrated and feel like if we could only be seen for the great talents that we are, then everything will fall in place.  And we feel like we are the only ones feeling this way.  But, clearly, we all feel this way.  We all think we are special.  We all feel we are unique.  We all feel like we are stars.  And we all know the percentages are low for "making it" but we all also think, "Why not me?"  If someone is going to get "that" role...why shouldn't it be me?  If not this one...then the next.  And we keep going.  

I'm sure as the show continues there will be major divergences from how it reflects my life.  But this pilot episode was pretty spot on.  I cringed. I groaned. I empathized. I waxed romantically about NY.  And I set a series recording. 

So I write

Look and you will find it - what is unsought will go undetected.
- Sophocles

On Friday afternoon I printed out the second draft of my screenplay.  I'm going to let it rest for a moment. Although I'm already thinking of ways to fix/tweak/clarify/heighten.  Having the second draft done is a big step but I still feel like there is something missing and I'm hoping that by stepping away for a moment, I can find that piece.  In the meantime, the goal this week is to focus on other projects and lose my tunnel vision.  I want to sit and brainstorm ideas for short films.  I want to paint.  There are fitness classes I'm going to and I'm going to keep up with my running everyday.  I have a casting workshop tomorrow night and plans to go bowling with my Improv class buddies.  I envy people that can sit down and write for hours at a time.  To write screenplay after screenplay until they are piled up, just waiting to be produced.  But I don't write because it's my passion.  I write to feed my passion.  I write so I can act.  I write to provide opportunities; to be an active participant in this career.  I could just wait for the phone to ring...and sometimes I do.  But there is only so much that I can control.  When I was cast in "True Love," the writer/director later admitted that when he saw my headshot come across his submissions, I was what he had pictured in his head when he wrote the part.  That, my friends, is extremely rare when you are not a "name" actor.  That was luck, a fluke, a lovely piece of coincidence.  And that doesn't happen often.  I can't control when that sort of providence happens...unless I'm the one writing the parts.

Voting time!

Remember how I asked you to help us get nominated for the Indie Intertube Audience Choice Award?  Well it worked!!  Thank you!  We're in the first round of voting now...and I need your help again.  It's super-super-easy to do.  Just go to the IndieIntertube.tv homepage, look to the right and you'll see a poll that looks like this:

Find GIRL PARTS (it's alphabetically arranged), click the box and click "vote".  You're done!  Or...you can keep voting.  Yep, you can vote as often as you'd like.  So feel free to refresh the page and vote again. And again.  And again.

Thanks for your help!!

1/12

Here we are...starting the second month of the year.  2012 is already one twelve complete.  Where does it go?

Yesterday I found out that I "passed" Level 201 of Improv.  After our graduation show, you have to wait to receive official word that you've passed before moving onto the next level.  Looks like most (if not all) of my classmates made the cut and we're hoping to sign up for a class together in 301.  Right now classes are all sold out but hopefully they'll add some new options soon.  It took me a year after 101 to start 201 and I wasn't sure that I'd want to go beyond the second level.  Improv felt like a fun class to take in order to learn new skills that would hopefully come to use in auditions.  So I thought I'd take a few classes, get what I needed and move on.  But now?  I kind of loved my 201 class and the challenge of Improv is something I want to continue with.  It helps with auditions and it also helps with my writing.  So here I am...refreshing the classes page on the website to see when they add new ones.  Who knew?

I think I'll do a monthly wrap up the first of every month.  This month is easy because it was a bit of a slower month.  Hopefully next month's wrap up will be a beast to recount and I won't even want to because there is too much to talk about!

January 2012

• Signed with my manager!
• Got all my tools in order for her (headshots touched up, uploaded, printed, updated resume, updated profiles on casting sites, etc.)
• Two casting director workshops that went well
• Two commercial auditions
• Graduated and passed Level 201 Improv
• Second draft of screenplay nearly complete

Here's to February being abundant with opportunity and that we'll want to squeeze everything we can out of that extra day we get this year!

Many have a new mantra

My fellow dreamers have a new battle cry:  "Dream big. And dream fierce."

So thrilled for Viola Davis, Octavia Spencer, the cast of The Help and all of the other "and the actor goes to" recipients last night.

Please nominate!

I better be careful. I might get sunburnt.

I'm clearly enjoying the balmy January weather here in LA...beats the heck out of a NY winter!  I've set up shop on my patio and am about to get some writing done.  But before I get started, I have a favor to ask. If you enjoyed GIRL PARTS, please nominate us for the Indie Intertube Audience Choice Award.  It takes less than 30 seconds to do and if we win it would mean a lot...because we love our fans!  Just visit THIS LINK and fill out the form.  Thanks guys!!

And the nominees are...

The Oscars feel closer than ever this year:

• The Artist received 10 nominations.  The casting director of The Artist?  Heidi Levitt - who cast me in my Hyundai spot toward the end of last year.

• Time Freak was nominated in the Live Action Short Film category. My short film, True Love, screened alongside Time Freak at the HollyShorts Festival in August.  We knew when we saw it, it was something special.  Seeing them nominated is just further affirmation...dreams come true, y'all.

• African Chelsea, a short film my friends did, qualified for the Oscars but did not get nominated in the end.  The lead of that film is my co-star in Girl Parts and good friend Corinne Becker.  Brent Roske, the director/writer of African Chelsea and also a friend, made a solid push for a nomination and that has led to him to begin shooting a feature this March starring Sally Kirkland, who also starred in African Chelsea.

• Octavia Spencer was nominated for Best Supporting Actress for The Help.  I like to call her my "twitter buddy" - from the few tweets we've exchanged regarding BookPALS, she seems like an incredibly grounded and relatable human being.  Which clearly is reflected in her work.  Not to mention, she just premiered Smashed, the movie my friend co-produced...which I talked about yesterday.  No doubt the cast and crew of that film are also thrilled for their co-star.  The fact that Melissa McCarthy was nominated for Best Supporting Actress for Bridesmaids has got to be the icing for Octavia.  These two have been good friends for years and are both now being recognized for their work after an extended time in the business.  To be having the same level of success at the same time as a friend that you came up in the ranks with...I can only imagine!  What a surreal and awesome feeling it must be.  As I near my first decade mark of pursuing this dream, I know that the payoff is possible...and it is that much sweeter because of the dedication it took to get there.

• Thrilled that Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close was recognized for Best Picture.  You all know how much I loved this movie.  It was late to the awards race so it didn't get much recognition in the earlier ceremonies but you can't get any bigger than the Oscars.  Would have loved to see Thomas Horn recognized for his work in the film but in a year that saw both Leonardo DiCaprio and Ryan Gosling snubbed in the Best Actor category, the competition was clearly steep.

As I sit here, in my chair, sipping some tea and about to work some more on my screenplay, I am humbled by these accomplishments of the people I know, the people I know of and the people that inspire me.  This is never an easy road and to see their work come to fruition at the highest level of this industry helps to motivate me to keep going.  As Bonnie Gillespie eloquently wrote in her column yesterday:

Bad audition? Stuck on a plot point in a script you're writing? Released from avail after being sure the gig was yours? Dropped by your agent when things were starting to pick up? Edited out of the final cut of the film you told everyone you'd shot? Told you're too old or too skinny or too ethnic or too anything else for whatever particular role you really wanted to play? Snubbed in the casting room? Hating your reel after having spent a ton on it? Missing your family back home? 

Yep. It's all hard. The only thing harder is not pursuing your dreams.

Today is a reminder that it all can be worth it.